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Well, I've done something in my life that is going to be extremely good for me. It may not seem like it at first, but please, trust me on this one.

Background:

I started college last fall (of 03). It was great. I had great friends, and had a good time. I did well in my classes, and I was enjoying being out on my own.

Second semester, things went downhill. I partied a little to hearty, made my mistake and paid the price. I would have been OK if it weren't for this one class with this real bitch of a professor. He hated me, and I knew it. He hated that I knew the information, and still did poorly on his tests (I am a HORRIBLE test taker).

Struggled through the semester, and vowed never to take 17 credits again. It was ROUGH, and that class killed my spirit to go. I did, indeed, fail that class. I started hating school, and regreted my choice of going to that college. I tried to perk up and do well in my other classes, but it became a job that I hated with every ounce of my being. I could hardly stomach waking up in the morning having to face that shit day after miserable day.

This semester, it's gotten worse. I am taking 12 credits (11 is the minimum), and figured that I'd take the semester easy and regroup my GPA. I've got that same asshole professor for 2 classes (when I registered, the professor was "TBD" and the class was not offered at another convenient time for me (conflicted with another course or were at 8pm and 9pm respectively, 3 nights a week). I thought I could deal with it, and I had learned all of the information he was teaching. First test came up and I choked. I knew the information, I just couldnt get it out on paper. (this man is notorious for horrible test questions, lots of doublespeak and such. Like GWB wrote the damn thing).

Got the test back and I got a 41% on it. After class, he told me flat out, "you will not likely pass this class." The next test (he only gives tests, no other way to bring up your grade) was after the official cutoff date for withdrawing from a class.

So, I had to make a choice. Fail the class, and risk failing out of school (absolutely not an option. I REFUSE to fail out of school). Withdraw from the class, and no longer be considered a full-time-student (thus being booted from campus). Suffer through a failing class and focus efforts on other, totally mind numbing classes. To keep a GPA that would keep me in school, I'd have to ace all of the classes (one of which, Dr. Asshole teaches), I can't risk that. All of these options leave a permanant blemish on my college record.

So, I took the 4th door.

Tomorrow, I will be finishing off the transfer paperwork, and withdrawing (with a relatively clean record, i.e. I didn't fail out) from this school.

Future schools will never see this semester, it'll be like it never happened.

But wait, you say. How is this good?

I've already spoken with an advisor at the local community college, set up a schedule for the spring semester, and have all of the transfer paperwork ready to go. All I have to do is officially register for classes the 3rd week in November, and I'll be set for the spring semester. I'm transfering schools, without finishing the semester. I was assured that this happens more often than one would think. That was a comforting thought, and I didn't feel quite so alone anymore.

I'll be taking the rest of this semester, working my ass off to pay off my debt, and get myself started with a bit of money and a new outlook on life.

Next fall, I make a choice to either continue at community college and build my GPA up further, or transfer to a different school. I'm undecided about that right now, so I'll keep thinking.

I'm really, actually, excited about this. I was MISREABLE at school. I hated waking up, I hated being there. All of my friends drink religiously, and I have since quit (I started school 2 months ago with a case of Amber Bock [24 bottles]. I have 15 left, and I've given away at least 5 or 6). I would go to class in the morning, eat lunch, go back to my room and sleep for a bit. It sucked. Seen the movie Office Space? My school life was just like that. Now I'm doing something about it. I felt like I was wasting everyone's time, and my parents money.

I'm not really happy that it had to come to this, but I knew at the beginning of the semester that the only thing keeping me at school was being so close to the River. I knew that I would not be attending that school past this year. I couldn't take it anymore, and so I did something about it. I'll bid my farewell to the river, and be sure to visit when I go to my girlfriends house.

I felt like I was going down the same road, every day. And I was getting to a sink-hole that I couldn't get around so I'd be stopped. Every day, I ended up at a sink-hole. The only thing I could do, is take a different road. And that's what I am doing.

This asshole professor has ruined my last day (he always speaks very gloomily about the future of the human race. I got sick of hearing his biased and negative comments).

Anyway, I thought I would share. Everyone seems to be posting their changes in their lives, I thought I would post mine.

I didn't become really excited about the opportunity that I'll have until this morning when I got a hair cut. At Shepherd (the college), I felt like I was shutting doors to my future by staying there and putting myself in jeopardy of flunking out. I finally feel like I am taking a stand in my life, and making my own decision. I'm stopping in the current, and changing my direction. I'm standing up for myself, and it's long overdue. I didn't realize how good this will be for me until this morning, when I told the woman cutting my hair exactly what I wanted done instead of just letting her do her thing. My hair looks good now goddamnit, and so does whatever lies ahead.

That's my story. Sorry for such a long post.

Way to go, Phil!!! YES!!!

Doesn't it feel good to not only have direction in your life. . . but to be at the wheel, too?

YEA! I like it. I felt like I was dead ended before, I feel better now

Thanks, yet again, for the support Art!

Seriously. . . . wasn't it easy, though?

All anything ever takes is two things:

1. The will to make a DECISION
2. The momentum to carry it out


Damn. . . I feel like Van Wilder, now!


"Remember my creedo, Timmy! Don't be a fool, stay in school!"

Just to clarify, I am NOT dropping out. I am transfering.

Lol, just want to make sure that is ABUNDANTLY clear. I am not, and will not, drop out of school. I am taking full advantage of the opportunity presented to me.

Exactly. That's just one of my favorite quotes from the movie.

Ahh, alright. Just wanted to make sure (for everyone too).

I always feel it's better to pick a path and stumble down it than sit in indecision until the sun sets and you're stuck with whatever is thrown at you. OK, I stretched that a little too far, but you know what I mean. People change schools (and majors) all the time so I wouldn't sweat it. And what price can you put on mental health? Imagine that movie Office Space as your life. It was mine for a bit and that's why I won't go back to an office regardless of the money. The more unique a person you are, the more I think you'll have to struggle to get where you should be, but at the end you'll hopefully be successful in life and happy with yourself.

And asshole professors can certainly ruin a class just as great ones can make anything interesting. I feel a little more confident now to offer advice. Now if I could get published I could do motivational speaking. Maybe not.

Good luck and as long as you can still go, it doesn't matter if it takes an extra year or so.

Steve

Thanks Steve! I was anxiously awaiting your reply!

I changed majors TWICE in college. And I turned out just fine. . .






. . . . I think.

Damn, the pressure is getting to be too much. I'm going to end up like an old Stanley Steamer that no one remembered to keep an eye on the boiler.

Steve

Good move man. I took a semester off to go camp, same deal. Changed my major, and am doing quite well in my 15 units of upper div. classes that ive never taken the prereqs for. I'm not busting my ass for grades either, it just comes; I'm happy to be there. My semester before i pulled a 1.6. A fresh start and a little space from the grind is a wonderful thing. I wish i had done your move too, i saw it comming.

Wow, and I thought I had it rough at college...

I have no minimum hours per semester, and I only hafta maintain a 2.0 GPA, I'm at a 2.6 something now.

I've failed 3 classes now, one of which was a retake of the first class I failed. I used one of my two Grade Forgivenesses for that too. Brilliant huh?

That's why I'm taking a break this semester. I've been worrying about too much other stuff in my life (when it's really not even necessary) and school was just making things worse. I plan on going back in January with a much more positive outlook.

Anyway, congrats on the decision Phil. There are no such things as bad decisions if you ask me, just good decisions that teach us more valuable lessons than others.

Geez phil, you're gonna die if you stay in college, and i think i'll die if i don't get into college...
best of luck to you on it all, my friend.

-=tristan

Thanks for the support guys! I'm heading back to campus now to start getting my shit out of my dorm room.

I'm taking next week off so I can figure myself out before I go to work. I've gotta organize some things, and I've gotta give the Legacy some long needed TLC that it's been missing because of school. She's gotta be reliable, and I couldn't give her the attention she needed at school .

Cool, Phil. I'm impressed that you took a situation that would make most people flail and give up, and instead logically figured out what you would need to do to get where you want to go, and then did it!

I agree, good show Phil! You took your situation, assessed it, decided what was the problem was and what a solution may be and then acted on it. You're very smart and only 19 (almost). You have plenty of time to pursue school. If you're stressed out by the situation at school and are failing or even not pulling the grades that you know you can, then you're wasting time and money and a little break will do you good. Heh, and another thing, will this bring you a little closer to that special someone? Wink wink. Cause that will definitely make for a happier Phil.

Phil, just roll with the punches and keep on track as much as possible. Let me tell you my story. I'll be brief.

I went to a tech college for broadcast communications for three semesters and dropped out for a couple years while I thought out my plan. I went back then for electronics which I always enjoyed and got an associated degree with a 3.2 cum, not bad. Immediately thereafter I went to RIT for a while to pursue a BS in telecommunications. It didn't work out because of money mostly. My mother didn't have the funds and I couldn't qualify for state aid because I was out of state so I foundered and came back to the tech school I went to before and got a BS from there. It was REALLY hard. I was trying to hurry things up so I was taking 20 and 21 credits a semester with physics and diffeqs in the mix. I had my share of poor test scores and class drops too. It sucks having to retake a class but I hung in there and finished. All in alll it took me 5 1/2 years to get my degree from the beginning of my associates to the end of my bachelors. It was a true test. I bit the bullet and went in debt but ultimately it was worth it.

The moral of my story is that it's important to keep focused on what you want. Life deals you setback after setback and you just got to keep driving relentlessly forward, especially when it comes to education. At this point in your life it's a lot easier to go to school so capitalize on that. It gets much harder as time goes by, unless you can find a place that will reimburse your tuition down the road. It can be hard to figure sometimes but as long as you're not sitting on your intelligence and not using it you're doing well. Keep plugging away. You're a smart guy, I'm sure you'll do well. Nobody ever said it would be easy but at least you're trying. Good luck. Hope that helps.

Thanks Vikash, Matt and Scott! I was driving back to campus today, going to move stuff out of my dorm, and I realized what a great move this really is. It's 12:30, and I'm home. A place I enjoy being more than on the River. I know the roads, I know the people, I know the environment. I'm comfortable being here, instead of feeling like I am somewhere that I'm not really wanted.

And yes Matt, I'll be closer to her . I'm actually going to visit her this weekend . She's been really cool and really supportive of this, as have my family and friends (as you all have shown). Having people like this in my life, really up my mood and make me feel good about my future. I'm gonna do well. I'm a pretty smart kid, I've just gotta start using that to carve things up a bit better for myself. I lived in the mantra of "It's not what you know, it's who you know" for to long, and it got me a good way, but I've come to find out that what you know is just as important as who you know, and I need to capitalize on that for a little while.

Everyone tells me I've got a head for business, and that I should persue a career in that field.

It's still a lot who you know, but you need to be able to impress those people for it to work!

I probably don't have to recommend that you should keep educating yourself while you're out a semester. I know the shit I've taought myself has helped me at least as much as my formal education. I never got a degree, but I wish I had the money and emotional well-being to have done it. Even if I probably wouldn't have pursued the career as there's little for design studios in Boston and I don't think I could live anywhere else and maintain myself as best as I can, it still would help with job hunting. Hell, even getting a worthless ID degree from Wentworth (my first school that for some reason everyone is impressed by) would've helped me as nobody but designers know CCS.

Steve

Congrads on taking control and making a change to make yourself happier.
I just changed my major to my minor on monday, mainly to make myself feel better/not totally stressed out. It was quite contested by the parents, as I pulled good grades and was on track with everything last year. It's totally worth it to sleep better despite not knowing what career I will have.

Glad to here it Phil. I wish I knew what I was doing in life, I also have that strange drive that won't let me just give up. Im suprised its held up considering im gonna be in debt about 60K after college (about a year and a half left to go), my degree means absolutly nothing (other than it stating that I graduated from art school), Ill probably have to move around a lot ( I had I hard enough time moving from NH to CO when I was 5) and I still don't know if this is what I really want to do in life. At least im almost done with general education classes. doesn't help that I have a 95% chance of NOT finding someone special at my school, And I absolutly HATE driving down to denver almost every day, the city is like Mordor to me, full of unhappy assholes (orcs). Guess I got a long way to go...Shoulda taken a year off after high school to collect myself...oh well at least ill be 21 and be absolutly completly DONE with school as long as I dont change careers. maybe when my next quarter starts next week ill figure some more stuff out, but ive been saying that for awhile now.

Glad I read through this post, I think it has revived my "bring it on" to the world attitude, now time for some good old punk rock!

BAC5.2 wrote: I'm a pretty smart kid, I've just gotta start using that to carve things up a bit better for myself.
Everyone tells me I've got a head for business, and that I should persue a career in that field.

And you're modest too, geez.

I think you should find what it is you love and do that. Too many people, most people in fact, never think about what it is they love. Not many discover that but those who do prosper.