legacycentral bbs

Got a call today. My teen son got picked up by the police. Posession of Meth and under the influance. Had my mothers credit card numbers on a note pad in his pocket and a glass pipe.

He HAS been behaving odd in the past couple months. Ever since he started hanging out with these no-goodnicks down town, known druggies. Got kicked out of school, sleeping upto 14 hours a shot and just behaving freaky. I was thinking pot and a bad attitude.

Might have to sell my Beretta before we go for a trip downtown. I realy want to go clean up the town and know the police arnt gonna do squat as usual. Gotta wounder how many people have to have thier lives ruined before someone else doesnt have to ruin THIER lives to make things right.

I know where you're coming from, but with probably less intensity since I don't have kids, though my favorite cousin has a serious problem with crack and heroin (plus being an alcoholic). I hate drugs and all that shit that goes with it. The worst part is not being able to do anything. If only you could suspend people's free-will for short periods.

If I were on a jury, there'd be no murder convictions on a citizen taking out scumbags the way they should. Not that I'm trying to encourage you to do it. I'd hate to see you go to prison because of this fucked system we have. The kind of system that gives large monetary awards to people who get shot breaking into somoene's house in the middle of the night or spends more money on keeping some child-killer alive in jail every year than families in most parts of the country could live comfortably on. And people who could best serve society if given the chance have to scrape through school on two jobs if they're lucky.

Sorry for the rant. I hope your kid sees the problem and pulls out of it. Best of luck.

That sucks and I'm really sorry to hear that Redlined.

I agree with most of your rant, evolution. What you have to realise is all these people that sell, smoke, die from and so on also have parents and relatives. What if some pissed off parent shot your drug dealing kid? Would you still be on that jury?

I agree with the last part of Steve's post, that it's messed up when people get prosecuted for defending their homes. I can't agree with the ultra tough stance on drugs in general though. Crack, coke, heroin and related narcs are dangerous substances and there should be tough laws for those but when it comes to other things like weed I think killing is a bit extreme of a punishment. That said, it sucks your kid is involved with it. It may be a good thing that he was caught if he can get into treatment. Hopefully, he is still under 18.

Yes and yes. Even though my kid is stealing and doing drugs and getting kicked out of school and all kinds of neferious deeds. (he has been in handcuffs more times than I have). I keep catching myself saying "But hes such a good kid".. and apparently im wrong.

I don't think you're necessarily wrong that he's a good kid. When people have addictions they become another person, it really brings the bad side out in people. I have/had a friend who did all kinds of shitty things to people in his life and it ultimately resulted in his near death. I think that to get better he needs to get the hell away from his environment, dealers, friends and basically start all over again fresh. Treatment is a good first step but he does need to step up at some point and admit something drastic needs to happen for him to become healed and to become the person you know he can be. I hope it turns out well.

^ +1. Good luck with it. He's right when he says drug addictions can seriously change a person. Some people can handle addictions but it doesnt sound like your son can. Hopefully you can get through to him.

Not to distract from the issue, but I thought I'd answer a question posed: I'd never have a kid, but if I did and he became a drug dealer (or a rapist or some other kind of scumbag), I'd dump him in the ocean myself. I'd maybe feel guilty since I'm the one that raised him, but I've seen plenty of people - some become bad, some are good people that do bad things, and some are just born scumbags. What if Hitler's parents had had the good sense to drown the prick as a kid? I have a criminal mind, but no sympathy for criminals. If I can resist it almost anyone should be able to.

I think that everyone deserves second and sometimes even third chances. I think the problem with taking a hard line is that everyone has a different idea of what a 'scumbag' is. It's easy to say to just kill 'em but things are never that easy when it comes down to it. As far as Hitler goes it's the killing that perpetuates killers. Another thought too. Who's to say that two psychos can't have a child that they WANT to be a killer too.

Edit: for tone, clarity.

It's a tragic situation, and the people kids hang out with have more of an effect than most imagine. I've seen a lot of this in my family, and it makes me hesitant to have kids of my own.
For my sister it took repeated stays in different jail systems. I could always tell when she was using by the sudden weight change if nothing else. That and the occassional "Can you watch my son for a couple of hours", and then she doesn't show up for several days. In those times, I'm more comfortable with watching the kid myself than thinking about where he could be with my sister. Ironically, my mother has had problems with this as well. It's kind of tough going to the local county jail for visitation, seeing your sister at 930 and your mom at 1030.
I've also seen my sister on the front page for being in the wrong crowd. She was visiting a friend the day after she got out of jail, watching movies in the living room when a SWAT team raided the house. The guys there started shooting back at the police. There were lots of drugs and even bodies in the basement of people who lived there. It was months before the court decided she couldn't have been involved with the homicides because she was in jail when they took place. Still, that's three months back in jail just for being there.
It took an entire change of environment, and the loss of most of her "friends" while she was incarcerated, to get her out of it. Telling kids, or even adults, that they shouldn't hang out with certain people is tough. The consequences are tougher though. I lost a lot of sleep over years of it.
What I find most astounding about the case with Hitler is not that he led the genocides, but that he also convinced an entire civilized nation to participate through the use of nationalism (it's where the word "Nazi" comes from) and even patriotism, slight as the differences are. I thought it could never happen again, that we knew enough history to avoid it, but the last decade has shown that it's possible even in the US to rally a modern nation to a ruthless cause in the name of national pride; especially if tied with religion. ...maybe that's similar to the youth/drug problems in that it's going with what seems to the norm accepted by the others? Social peer pressure.

i remember i used to hang out with some pretty bad crowds. one of my good friends mike. was a little off the wall and a little unstable but was always calm. then he tells me about some guy that pissed him off and that he was going to do something about it.

next day i read in the news paper about some house being lit on fire with a hole familie still in side asleep. there truck being stolen and some other things. with his name right there in the news paper i said to my self holy shit. well i get a call from him, about him runing from the cops and saying hes out in Kentucky from Washington. so right after i got done talking with him i called the police and explained where he was.

they cought him 1 day later.

coke, crack, heroin, meth etc are becoming big problems even in rural-ass upstate new york.

I've been asked by aquantances to "make some" for them because I'm "smart"

I used to call them friends, not aquantances

have seen more of my friends go to jail than I care to admit for stupid stuff like running from the cops with a trunk full of whatever

to be honest, it's too bad your kid isn't just smoking a little pot here and there.

this meth thing is going to be hard to beat. I wish I could say jail would be good for him, but it just seems to make petty criminals into lifers


good luck man

my .02.
1. keep better track of him
you may drive him nuts doing it, probably your self too. he may even run away.
doing so shows you care, and that you aren't giving up on him. He needs that whether he realizes it or not.
he NEEDS you to be there regardless of how stupid he becomes.
he NEEDS you to be there to pickup after him MOST of the time, but not always. you will hit a point where you need to let him sit in jail for a while (not prison). now may even be a good time to do it.
YOU know your son better than any of us do.
I was lucky. I never got into drugs, I was too smart to do them. I did other stupid shit. I ended up all right thanks to my parents and the good friend I had.
life changes, hopefully he'll figure out his soon.

or you could just move away :-p

Just thought I'd post to keep a positive vibe going for your boy. I've done more than my share of everything and mangaged to keep it all under control. But, I've never messed with Meth, mostly because of the makeover and because I could never see doing something that was made in a bathtub. Keep your head up and always hope for a breakthrough.

yeah why meth? Pot wouldn't suprise me, mushrooms and lsd are fine depending on the age, coke I've never done and wouldn't go near the crap but it seams popular nowadays....but meth, meth scares the shit out of me. Tell him (or her) to just smoke some pot and play some video games, can't get in too much trouble that way

As for dropping out of school, I did the same, went back for my GED got 92% on all subjects and have had no issues finding work or post secondary schools to attend so don't worry too much about that.

I (being 15 almost 16) would say its time to put the cuffs on him yourself. Put him on a leash so short that he feels like goin to the bathroom alone is a major privilege. This is hard when hes at school but thankfully summer is near. Make this summer hell for him.

Make sure YOU tell him what and when he eats, sleeps, pisses, and thinks, and how he dresses. Put an alarm on his window and the doors out of the house.

The reason I am sayin this is because this is what my dad would do to me stop that kind of crap. And I would hate him for it immediatley but another year or 2 would love him 4 it.

Well, theres a teens 2 cents on the matter

On a happier note I hope all turns out well.

smh0101 wrote:I (being 15 almost 16) would say its time to put the cuffs on him yourself. Put him on a leash so short that he feels like goin to the bathroom alone is a major privilege. This is hard when hes at school but thankfully summer is near. Make this summer hell for him.

Thats just about the worst thing he could do.

My parents did that to me when I got into drugs and I ended up living on the street for the better part of a year.

Honestly, I dont know what I would do. I never got into that stuff myself, but I was into some pretty nasty stuff for a while, and I dont think anyone could have talked me out of it. Especially with something like meth, they have to WANT to stop taking it. No one can force them to stop. Sending them to jail would be a joke. Its easier to get drugs in jail than it is on the street.

The trouble is, he's gonna comtinue to do it until he wants to get over it. My cousin didn't want to kick it untill the third time he was caught. He spent 16 months in prison, and another 6 months in a treatment center on work release. Its good to have him back.

I think the "boot camp" method works well. You have to break things down before you can rebuild.

stories like this and looking at some of my friends is why i wont be having kids
ive got a buddy in a band, i went over to his house one day while they were practicing in his dads garage and they were just sitting around smoking pot with the garage door open, one of them does coke ...like alot of it, his dad was out of town for the week
ive got another friend that lives in his truck and at friends houses, he got kicked out of his house (hes 17), i dont even know why all that happend, he said he told his died to drop dead and his mom went crazy and started swinging at him

i just dont know what id do if i found out my kid did meth, theres nothing harder out there than meth, hope he can pull through

my ex gf's dad beat her when he found out she was doing it when she was 15 and I really don't blame him. She doesn't do it now but her personality has been completely changed for the worse and of course she's hooked on aderol now thanks to her mom getting her a perscription. God help anyone that tries to get her off of aderol. She stopped taking it when she moved in with me, and I thought i was gonna die for two weeks.

Murphy wrote:stories like this and looking at some of my friends is why i wont be having kids
ive got a buddy in a band, i went over to his house one day while they were practicing in his dads garage and they were just sitting around smoking pot with the garage door open, one of them does coke ...like alot of it, his dad was out of town for the week
ive got another friend that lives in his truck and at friends houses, he got kicked out of his house (hes 17), i dont even know why all that happend, he said he told his died to drop dead and his mom went crazy and started swinging at him

i just dont know what id do if i found out my kid did meth, theres nothing harder out there than meth, hope he can pull through

Well, in fairness, for every messed up person there's at least two good ones. Meth is one of the most destructive drugs out there. It's too bad there's not a stimulant that is powerful without tweaking people out and getting them hooked. Either that or the pace of life needs to slow down.

dzx wrote:my ex gf's dad beat her

I totally blame him. Thats horrible. As if she didnt have enough problems already.

Tleg93 wrote:Someone needs to find a stimulant that is powerful without tweaking people out and getting them hooked. Either that or the pace of life needs to slow down.

The stimulent effects of meth are some what of a sideeffect. What they're mostly going for is the 20-30 minutes of intense euphoria they get right after taking it. There are lots of other stimulants that give you a lot of energy and keep you awake, but they dont have that same rush

Splinter wrote:

dzx wrote:my ex gf's dad beat her

I totally blame him. Thats horrible. As if she didnt have enough problems already.

You didn't live with her for 6 months It's like living with satan. Incidentally, he died a month after she moved back home...